2/5/06

Tomes

They stand in hushed rows at attention,
spines straight, keeping their leaves tucked tight
between covers—some bruised, some wounded
here, an amputated afterword, there, a new recruit
smelling of paper, ink, and binding. Most were drafted
by an author who has long since set aside his quill,
extinguished his candle, and slept without waking.

Many have not seen action for years, for decades.
All around, the library is filled with a quiet warfare
of silent knowledge held fast
against the darkness of an empty carrel,
uncaring world. Each soldier guards the voices
of the dead, and in their purple hearts
beats the ancient rhythm of poets and sages past.

-Elizabeth

1 comment:

a poet said...

METAPHORRRRRRRR???

Hahaha, wow. What an amazing tribute to those old books in the library with plain covers and the titles nearly unreadable from age. You know, I thought it was odd when I read "leaves" in the second line, then when I got to "amputated afterwards" and "binding," I had it figured out. Until then, I thought it was some military poem. Who needs subtlty when you have such a well-proportioned metaphor like this. It doesn't go on too long, and it doesn't leave us unfulfilled.

I have small gripes, that are really only nit-picking to help you work toward perfecting this poem. First stanza, fourth line: take out the comma before "there." It's a bit of an abrupt pause. Kinda feels like someone slamming on the brakes for a second before they get to a stop light, and then letting the car slowly roll forward a bit until they fully stop. I'm sure you get my point. Secondly, in the second stanza, fourth/fifth line, you have "...empty carrel, / uncaring world." To me, it doesn't sound right. Feels like you need something else in between there, but an "and" wouldn't sound right; I'm not really sure what you could do with it. Maybe it's fine and I'm just reaching, but better that I say something than nothing--I noticed it.

Favorite parts: amputated afterwards, empty carrels, the last two lines, the whole freakin' poem.

This one was even better than your last poem, Elizabeth. I love your style. Keep writin'.


- Bob